Last week we talked about the Battleship and now we will continue with the other four boats…

The Aircraft Carrier

The Battleship comes at you front and center. You can see them coming on the horizon. They are not afraid of any conflict. You know who and where they are because they want you to know it. The Aircraft Carrier is completely different. They attack through others, at a distance. Just like a real aircraft carrier brings hundreds of planes for battle, this person brings friends to the battle. They can never fight their own battle. They cannot battle alone and choose instead to bring other people into the battle.

Most of the times they need back up because they don’t have the fire power or strength within themselves to launch an attack. They have told their story to anyone who will listen to get them onboard for the battle. They have armed them with ammunition and have sent them to attack the person who has dared to enter battle with them. Just as an airplane squadron launched from a carrier finds power and safety in numbers they need more people on their side. They will say what they need to say to get others to fight their battles. The truth is how they see it, and they will tell their squadron what they want them to know and then they send them to find the target.

Nothing can prepare for this attack except to understand who is out in the water. There is no loud, face to face battle; this battle is fought through friends, acquaintances, and family. You have to see the shadows of incoming planes and realize that there will be wave after wave of attacks. Even though we can get mad about everyone knowing there is a problem in a relationship, we need to ask one question: “Who do I bring with me to a fight?”

Do you find that you share a battle with anyone who will listen to you? Can you do what the Bible asks us to do in Matthew 5:23-24 (NCV) “So when you offer your gift to God at the altar, and you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there at the altar. Go and make peace with that person, and then come and offer your gift.” We must begin to realize that we need to start the conversation one on one and bring someone else into the discussion if it is needed. Most times people will be shocked that we will actually talk to them face to face. Most conflict is because of a misunderstanding between two people that if they just talked it out would be forgiven or worked out between the two of them.

The Cruiser

The medium sized boat in Battleship is called a cruiser. This boat’s job is to cruise the ocean and see what it can find. Many people are like this boat, cruising around life looking for conflict or trouble. They just seem to find trouble no matter where they go. You don’t really have to do or say anything; they can find a reason for conflict in any situation. You just have to realize that some people are out looking for a fight, looking for a reason to start a war. They are cruising hoping that something breaks off and they can let the guns fire away.

The only way to deal with a cruiser is to be aware of the people around you and what they are doing. We have to realize that some people just enjoy conflict and are not happy unless they are into some kind of scrape with someone or anyone. Conflict is inevitable with these people; you just have to find a way to steer clear of them. You cannot when a fight with a cruiser, because they will be back the next day and the next and the next. It is simply their nature to need and want conflict. Recognize the ship for what it is: a problem waiting to happen. You have to limit your interactions with them. In Romans 12:18 the Bible says:” Do your best to live in peace with everyone.” Living in peace at times means staying in your own part of the ocean.

Once again the real question we have to ask ourselves is simply this: “Do I cruise around looking for someone to scrape with?” Do I go with the assumption that if something is done it was to ruin my day, or a shot across my bow? We have to look inside of our hearts and actions to see if we really enjoy conflict more than we should. We need to understand that we are not the center of the universe and should not react like everything that happens is an attack against us. We need to give the same grace and patience to others that we need almost every day of our lives. Conflict is an inevitable part of our lives; we just do not have to let it be our first step in a situation.

Patrol Boat

The smallest boat in the game only takes two hits to sink. It only takes two hits because it is a small time player in the war game. The patrol boat does just what it sounds like. This boat simply patrols the waters and watches for action to happen. When it sees some action, it gets on the horn and lets other people know there is a fight going on. They don’t join in the fight. They just let everyone know it is happening.

Strange thing about life is that sometimes we find ourselves in a fight we didn’t even know was going on. We find out third hand how we said or did something to tick someone off and ruin their day. They are irate with us, but never find us to talk it out or just to even lob a shot at us. We are surprised by all the people who knew about the problem before we even had an idea a fight was happening. These people will not come at us one on one; they let everyone else know that there is a problem and just how much you did to cause all of the commotion.

The problem is not so much the conflict as it is how they have put the story out there. They have marshaled the troops against us and have turned the story to make themselves look the best they can. We hardly ever see them coming. All of a sudden there are a couple of battleships and aircraft carriers on us before we know we have even been spotted. The hard part is tracing back the incident or time that the offense even really occurred.

The frustrating part is that we are guilty before our side is even heard. The patrol boat has announced our position and how we ruined their day to all who will hear them. Once again we have to follow the advice of Jesus and go to the person who has a problem with us and face the issue head on. It is a scary proposition at times but unless we are willing to take the risk we may never recover a relationship or a good night’s sleep.

We must decide that we will not be a patrol boat when it comes to conflict. Sometimes the most helpful thing to do is to just shut your mouth. Do not go around and rehearse your conflict to your friends or the clerk at the grocery store. We need to be sure that we don’t share our grievances with the people around us just because we want to be told how bad we have been treated. After all, do you want peace or pity? We need to go to the person, no matter how intimidating it can be, and settle our conflict. Stand up for yourself. Don’t fight through others.

Submarine

Have you ever had one of those days? Here you go minding your own business and out of nowhere you are blindsided by someone and find yourself in a battle. That’s the thing about submarines. They are under the surface where we do not see them. They can attack when you least expect it or have an idea that there is a problem at all. Out of nowhere either through a word, or action or look; seriously sometimes God may be a little confused as to why they are mad. All you know is that you are the center of their anger and you are trying to figure out how or who put the bull’s eye on you.

The job of a submarine is to stay undetected until it is time to attack their target. They lurk beneath the surface of the water, and wait for a sign to surface and begin firing. Many a ship has gone down without any idea there was a sub even near them. Submarines are in the water at all times. It is a fortunate ship that finds them first and understands what lies beneath the surface of the ocean. On the other hand, though, it really does stink to be caught by a sub and ambushed before you know what is going on.

We need to realize that there are some people who are simply always ready to fight under the surface. Some people live just below the boiling point and a simple little thing can set them off against us. We just don’t see it coming at all. Out of nowhere comes a fight and argument that threatens to sink us in an all out attack. It is amazing how often people live with this underlying edge of hostility that is expressed at the slightest provocation. They are just looking for a fight, and willing to attack you when you aren’t looking. They are different from the patrol boat. They will face you head on and not back down from a fight. You just never see it coming until it happens. Yep, they come at you from nowhere but when they are on you, it is a fight you will remember.

You end up bailing water and trying to stay afloat while you feel the torpedoes rip through the hull of your life. You have to remove yourself from the fight and live to see another day. You can’t always take on a submarine; you have to know when you are taking on water and get away. There will be a time to talk with them when no torpedoes are flying.

Next week we will look at some questions to ask when are in the midst of a battle…