In Search of Camelot #4
A Kingdom Undivided
When we get married we join our lives with someone else. Sometimes we have known them for a good part of our lives and sometimes it is a whirlwind romance that leads to joining hearts together. In that moment we are creating a partnership or a kingdom together, just so we keep with the Camelot theme. When we make this commitment we are putting our lives in the hands and hearts of another person. The thing about kingdoms is that you have to work to keep them united. If you don’t spend each day growing closer we make a slow drift until one day the kingdom crumbles.
The book of Peter in the Bible talks about how to keep our kingdom from dividing. He talks about the role a king and queen play in kingdom life. These words have been used in the past to make this partnership one sided and more of one lording over the other. That is not Peter’s intent in writing this advice to a king and queen. So maybe we can look at in a new way and learn how to create an undividable kingdom.
The Queen of Hearts
A Wife’s Actions Speak Louder Than Any Words
In the same way, you wives should yield to your husbands. Then, if some husbands do not obey God’s teaching, they will be persuaded to believe without anyone’s saying a word to them. They will be persuaded by the way their wives live. Your husbands will see the pure lives you live with your respect for God. 1 Peter 3:1-2 (NCV)
Husbands are captured by the actions of their wives. Men are just visual creatures that believe what they see more than anything else. So for them to not become divided they are drawn in by the actions of their wives.
Always Remember A Beautiful Heart Matters More Than Outward Things
It is not fancy hair, gold jewelry, or fine clothes that should make you beautiful. No, your beauty should come from within you—the beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit that will never be destroyed and is very precious to God. 1 Peter 3:3-4 (NCV)
Woman are told and shown from a young age that beauty and body are all that matter. God wants us to understand that for a relationship to last and never divide is one that comes from a beautiful soul more than flashy eyelashes. It goes against all the magazines and social media says but it is true, a beautiful heart is so much better than anything in the world.
A Beautiful Kingdom Brings Glory to God
In this same way the holy women who lived long ago and followed God made themselves beautiful, yielding to their own husbands. Sarah obeyed Abraham, her husband, and called him her master. And you women are true children of Sarah if you always do what is right and are not afraid. 1 Peter 3:5-6 (NCV)
Those yield and obey thoughts have been used for years to make wives feel like second class citizens. You need to realize that kingdoms are strengthened by yielding to each other. If you stop reading at these verses you get a bad idea about what God means by this whole story. It is yielding as partners, seeking what is best for the other that keeps us together.
A King of Honor
Being Involved in Her Life
In the same way, you husbands should live with your wives …
1 Peter 3:7 (NCV)
What does it really mean to “live with”? You may think that just being in the same house is all it takes to keep the kingdom together. It is not that. A wife’s heart is won when she knows that her partner is interested in what interests her. Give time to her ideas and desires and every once in a while let her pick the movie. Most of all, listen without solving the problem. Just be there when you are there.
Live together in an understanding way
Live with your wives in an understanding way, since they are weaker than you. 1 Peter 3:7 (NCV)
Husbands need to do the impossible. To understand their wives hearts. I know it sounds like I’m being a jerk, but we need to learn what makes them tick and what makes them happy and then do that without complaining. Not because of that weaker word, but because we are called to love them like Jesus loves us.
Give grace to her and others
But show them respect, because God gives them the same blessing he gives you—the grace that gives true life. Do this so that nothing will stop your prayers. 1 Peter 3:7 (NCV)
What if God gave us the grace we give our partner? How much trouble would we been in? So we need to have grace for each other so that we can fix what needs fixing and just flow through the bad times. Without grace we will not have much of a kingdom at all.
Kingdom Questions For Us to Ponder
Finally, all of you should be in agreement, understanding each other, loving each other as family, being kind and humble. Do not do wrong to repay a wrong, and do not insult to repay an insult. But repay with a blessing, because you yourselves were called to do this so that you might receive a blessing.
1 Peter 3:8-9 (NCV)
- Is there unity and agreement or divisiveness and arguing?
- Is there understanding or judgment?
- Is there love or indifference?
- Is there humility or gloating?
- Is there kindness or bitterness?
- Is there revenge or forgiveness?
Maybe it is time to take a walk through your kingdom and see how you are doing. Talk to your partner and see how they think you are doing. After all you need to rule your kingdom together or it may divide and crumble.