Battleship
The Place of Conflict in Our Lives
It was two weeks before Christmas morning. My mom had wrapped gifts and placed them under our tree in Fort Worth, Texas. There was one gift with my name on it that drew my attention. I had asked for the game Battleship and that present had the look to be just what I wanted. When my mom would leave, I would shake the present and it sure did sound like Battleship was in there. The clincher came when I got my three year old brother to confirm that he saw my mom buy it for me. If she had ever found out, I probably would’ve never gotten that game.
I played that game from that Christmas morning every chance I got. Even when I left for college and came back to my mom’s house with my own sons, we would play on that same game board. All the times I spent playing that game with my brothers and sister or friends (and even my sons) I never stopped to think about what it meant to battle against other people. I think if we look at conflict in our lives, we need to realize a few things that will help us deal with conflict better.
First, we have to realize that conflict is inevitable. I have learned that when we rub shoulders with other people, we are likely to rub someone the wrong way. The first two brothers mentioned in the Bible, Cain and Able, had a relationship that ended in conflict as one brother killed the other. If we are alive and in close proximity to anyone else that is alive, we will eventually end up in conflict with each other. As people, it is an inescapable truth of our lives. With this truth in the forefront of our minds, we need not be surprised when we end up in an argument.
We also need to realize that since conflict is a part of life, we need to answer the question: How can I make conflict a positive experience in my life? I know that sounds like an absurd statement. Welcome to Christianity. After all, Jesus came to turn our world on its head and to change the way we view everything. How can something that is usually so destructive going to become useful or redeeming in our souls and lives?
That is where the game comes into play. We will start with the game because after all it is only a game. We will explore the ships that make up the game and figure out just what kind of fighter we are. Then we will look at the strategy we use as we battle the people around us. Finally, we will answer the question: “Why do we battle?” So come on board and let’s begin to learn from Battleship.
When it comes to conflict there are different approaches everyone tries to gain the victory. Just like the different ships in the game, there are different approaches to conflict. When you stop and think about the approaches, it really gives you insight into what kind of a person you truly are; besides the fact that you sure better know what boat is coming at you when you go to battle. It would be bad to bring a tug boat to a battleship war. Going into conflict with the right boat and understanding who is on the other side of the argument can go a long way to finding the peace we all long for in our relationships. We need to understand the boats and what they can accomplish in a conflict.
The Battleship
You ever see those films of battleships lobbing big ol’ bombs onto beaches? Imagine what it would be like to be sitting on the beach and you hear a whistle in the distance. An explosion seems to come out of nowhere. There is nothing but smoke and noise as the beach explodes around you. You are taken by surprise not only by the attack but with just how stinking loud and destructive it became.
Some people handle conflicts the same way. It seems that no matter what is going on, they come in with full guns blazing. They are not going to talk it out, discuss it, or even try to figure out what happened to cause the problem in the first place. No, they blow up any situation so that there is only debris and nothing to rebuild or repair the relationship.
They are loud and the bombs keep coming. They will argue until you finally just give in because you’re intimidated by the size and sound of the attack. It is difficult to not just give in every time, because we are tired of the carnage. They believe the volume and quantity of their attack will win the conflict. With a battleship many times all we can do is duck and cover until they hopefully run out of ammunition or interest.
The thing you have to explore most is not so much “Do I have a battleship in my life?” But to ask yourself: “Am I a battleship?” Of course, we might all deny that we are this kind of person or that we would never enter conflict in this way. Who is there in your life that you feel you can only win over if you come at them like a battleship? Who do you blast into oblivion just so you can sail off into the sunset a winner? One thing is certain, if a battleship comes at you, you better be ready for an all out attack that will turn your world upside down.
We will continue with four more ships next week…